...-=Dick to the Rescue... Again=-...

I often wondered what Richard emailed Mark a few months ago... Mark was so angry about it. I called Richard this afternoon and though I did wake him up (2:30am UK time!), he just said "So, I was right? And you were wrong?" I bursted out laughing then started crying. Despite my arguments with Richard and despite the many time we have called each other names... how is it that we can still forgive each other and remain as friends. I honestly dont know why I never deleted him on my facebook friends (apparently being deleted as a friend is a big thing!). I always thought that hey, he lives far away for me to delete him... he was nice to me... did good things to me and meant every single thing that he said. Yes, we've had huge arguments... really bad ones! But a single phone call fixes everything. I asked him if he can forward the email that he sent to Mark. He apologised for copying my email to him and including it to Mark's email, he said it was just to prove a point to Mark. I told him to forget about it.... I just want to know and see for myself how bad the email was and he said it wasnt actually that bad. Infact, he said it's something a decent person wouldn't need telling....

 

I've got the email now... and to be honest, it really wasnt that bad. I dont know why Mark over-reacted - oh yes, he didnt needed the stress cos he's ill! But after reading it and re-reading it... really, it isnt too bad at all... Infact it is a nice email. And yes, I have decided to post it here (of course with the permission of Richard!). I am also including part of my email that Richard attached to his email... just reading it now makes me feel sick! I loved him that much!!!

 

Hmmm.... here we go... you be the judge! Let me know if it is really that bad....

 

===================================================

 

From: Richard

To: markw
Sent: Sunday, 13 July, 2008 8:01:04 AM
Subject: Mate count yourself lucky

Mark,

 

I was on Skype with Anna till late today and mate, just learn to appreciate her more.

We all have our own pitfalls, yours is exceptional, but try to at least be kinder to her.

When you're hurting, she's hurting too. In fact she said she wishes she had your cancer.

I am not perfect to be saying all these things to you, I have been a bastard myself.

But she is a special girl. Treat her right.

If you don't want anything to do with her, no plans for her - let her go now.

I don't want her wasting her time. You should know that yourself, life is short.

She loves you mate. She deserves the best. I wish I realised that earlier on.

Too late for that now.

Either you appreciate her, respect her and love her.

OR, just be honest with her about things.

No more mucking around.

 

I care for her a lot... as a friend...

I just know how beautiful she is as a person.

 

Treat her right mate.

 

Good luck with your op on Monday anyway. She is really worried about you.

 

Richard

 

----- Forwarded Message ----
From: Anna

To: Richard

Sent: Sunday, 13 July, 2008 3:26:34 AM
Subject: Re: AND... But...

Hmmm...,

 

Talk about having a chatting marathon!? You dont just do it in bed these days huh?! hehehe.... Thanks for the chat. I really appreciate you listening to me. And yes, I now understand what you're trying to say.... The things we do for love... but sometimes, yes, it makes us think, is it all worth it? I really do love him.... like OMG I really do! I would do anything - and I mean ANYTHING for him!!! But he's not in love with me and you're right... you cant force someone to be with you. I have done my best... I'm just gonna wait till the end of this month. For fark's sake Piley... I'M HOT and ATTRACTIVE!!! And there are guys out there dying to be with me!!! But I choose to be with a cold person who doesnt even like me. So what do we say... have I wasted a good few years? I dont want to think that... I'm now 31... (gosh, I am indeed!) Do you think I need to just let this thing go, it will hurt, I will cry rivers and rivers of tears... will be broken hearted for a few months... BUT at least will still be young enough when I've recovered and found the next love (though will not be as great as this one) and try to settle down as you have advised. Maybe you are right - I deserve someone who will want to be with me... love me and care for me... and have a "PROPER" relationship.... it's been years since I've been in a normal relationship.... tsk! I miss the normality of things sometimes....

 

 

NOW.... that we have spoken about these things/issues... I've decided to write down the pro's and cons:

 

Pro's:

 

*He inspires me to do better things

*He makes me happy

*He is a really nice person when he's feeling ok

*He is smart and very intellectual

*I have this emotional connection with him

*He most times understands me

*I can talk to him about everything

*He'll be a good father if ever..... (which is unlikely..)

*I see us as a Yin/Yang couple, hot and cold, up and down, negative and positive poles....

*I like how he can be compassionate towards others

 

Cons:

 

*He is emotionally unstable

*He has a pattern of failed relationships - same reason of breaking up - temper, ego's etc...

*He has a temper - but he's not as bad as before and YOU!

*He doesnt see me attractive enough to be his gf - I know...WTF?!

*He's not ready to be in a relationship - which AGAIN is understandable dont you think?

*His mood swings are crazy - but if you'll think about it... if you are in his situation... wouldnt you be????

*He can be selfish and too self-absorbed

 

OKAY... you know what Piley, despite all of those con's... I can still see myself being with him in the next 5-10, 20 years.... You'd think I'm crazy... but I'm not. I actually had this discussion with Vannie ages ago... I think it was the same last year.... And Vannie said, she's only hoping that he will one day learn to appreciate me.... You know what, I think he does... he just cant express himself as he's got too much on his mind, too much on his plate and just too much stuff up's which really he doesnt deserve.....

 

After reading this email... THINK... do you think I will ever break up with him? I love this guy... I love him so much and I would do anything to try to help him get better, stick with through the end of his battle... And in the end, if I dont get back anything... well, I just know that not many people appreciate kindness.... but karma will just bring it back to me 10 folds....

 

I'm sorry Piley, I'm tough as a coconut to break.... Stubborn like red wine on your white Gucci shirt... The things we do for love.... Yes, count him lucky... But I think I'm lucky to have him in my life as well.... Hard to explain... but I know I am.....

 

Take care Piley... Kisses to your little girl Gillian....

 

Anna xxx